Guide to the Afterlife – for Terrorists
The Complete Guide, Edition 367 – a publication of the Intergalactic Resolutions and Advancement committee
Welcome to the Afterlife! Well, that worked, your planning, the explosion, the whole thing. I guess you could go ahead and feel some sense if accomplishment (go ahead now, you won’t have that feeling again for some time). And it didn’t really hurt much, did it? Just “gone” sort of.
So, now that you’ve settled in a bit, we’d like to discuss a little of what’s next, unless, of course, it’s too soon? No? Okay then, well, you can rest later, but you will have a busy schedule for the first fifty seven years or so, starting with the personal experience of every loss or heartbreak felt by anyone that you injured or killed, followed by a consideration of the loss of personal growth as a soul as well as accomplishments in the world, and all the unborn generations that you have more or less just stolen from all your victims.
Then of course there is the philosophical review period where every justification for your actions, personal, philosophical or (so called) religious is systematically shown to be fraudulent, such that you can fully appreciate the enormity of your crimes and the insult and shame you have stamped on your name, your family, your (so called) religion and your country.
There’s more of course, but maybe you’d like a cup of water.
Oh, sorry, no water on this level, I forgot…